Serving as President of R. Roger Rowe’s School Board is not what I thought it would be. My love for learning and for children seem to be well suited for such a role. It has been an education. I have learned the following: Intelligent, capable people can have a difference of opinion and can both be right; often there is more than one solution to a problem; and when we disagree, that does not make us enemies.
The politics of today are so divided and disparate. We have forgotten how to make room for people’s shortcomings and all-too-human mistakes. We dismiss good works and hard-earned achievements, while harping on that one wrong decision or failing. We create near-impossible standards where there is little room for human error or change of heart, denying the complicated nature of an issue or the fact that we are all far more complex and conflicted creatures than we would ever want to admit.
A Humbling Journey
We begin our role of “board member” in campaign mode, where one feels beholden to the promises they may have made or the hopes that others have placed on them, poised to make a difference — and then the real work begins. The work is a series of conversations, collaboration, compromise and complicated decision making. It is humbling to learn how much you do not know. It is a ritualistic and transformative meditation of constant listening, contributing, processing and reforming; It is also a journey of discovery where you find out if what you actually believe about yourself and others is true.
I always thought I was a “people person,” and being a board member certainly put that to the test and thankfully reaffirmed my conviction and faith in humankind. I really do like engaging with, working with, and helping people. For as many times as I have agonized over a decision, or taken a phone call where the person on the other end was disappointed, those negative experiences are way outnumbered by moments of grace. Times where a parent confided in me, or a child came up to me and hugged me, or shared how they remember something I said, and I leave the school starry-eyed and overwhelmed with a sense of purpose and joy. Is there any greater compliment than one that comes from a child?
Perfectly Imperfect
The above moments, however fleeting, make me want to continue to strive for the best we can be. But, it won’t be perfect, and it can’t be, because as much as we would want it to be so, we know life is everything but perfect.
We all reflect and take stock at the end of a calendar year, and I am approaching the 25th anniversary of my spinal cord injury. I know all too well about looking in the rearview mirror at the life I had walking, instead of making the life I now live each day not walking, full and beautiful. It might not be too far off to compare this to the nostalgia of the days of Dr. Rowe — days that might not be as good as we remember, and what we have right now, while unfinished, is more amazing than we grasp.
Devoted Parents, Students and Staff
To have Rowe parents who care as much as they do, who are always looking for ways to get more involved, who never forget to ask how they can better support our teachers and staff, because they care that much — that is special and rare. We have a gorgeous campus with a library right next door. We have students who are curious and excited to learn. We have an exceptionally devoted administration and staff who are available around the clock to support our students.
So, I am not looking back. We will move fearlessly forward, taking what we have learned and stepping into a future of hope. This hope is real if we have accepted our mistakes, have the courage and humility to change, and are also determined to protect and nurture what we hold dear. The precious gift to be cherished above all at Rowe is our close-knit community of amazing people — each individual, neighbor, colleague, and friend of which it consists.
All Worth It
Each one of us can be challenging, imperfect, and, at times, impossible — but we are all worth it. This is where the grace comes in. We must take a leap of faith and trust that, in spite of all our human frailties and diverse backgrounds and differences of opinion, we all have a unified, common goal: We all want the very best for our children and students. I’m sure there will be an overabundance of ideas on how we get there, but the craggy learning curve of my experience as a board member, president, parent, and human being, have prepared me for this conversation, and I’m ready and willing to have it. I hope you are too. Happy New Year.
Annette Ross is President of the Rancho Santa Fe School Board and a Covenant resident.